As anyone who has read more than a few of my posts knows, I spend a lot of time writing about things I read in medical journal articles. While I do love to read medical journal articles, I spend more of my time reading mom blogs about infertility / IVF. I say “mom” blogs because they are ALL written by moms (or women who really, really want to be moms). I can only imagine what my husband would write if he had a similar blog…. “DW insisted on peeing on a $10 HPT tonight even though she has her blood test tomorrow AM. It was positive. We are excited. I reminded her to ask the doctor tomorrow when we can start having sex again.”
Anyway, I read a lot of blogs. A LOT. I find them the same way people might find this—searching a topic and running across someone’s story. I often cheat and read the first entry followed by the last entry. I want to know, “how did this person get here” and “where did they end up?” Sometimes I catch someone right in the midst of their story (like I am now). But sometimes, happier times, I read the “this will be my last entry for a while” posting… because they’ve reached the end of their journey, wherever they ended up. Some had (via natural conception, help from a doctor, help from a doctor and an egg/sperm/embryo donor, or help through adoption or other means) a kid. Others (and I’ve found this to be the minority, so hold out hope!) did not. Either way, the journey was over. And for most of them, the painful path they followed was a vague memory, something they acknowledged that they learned and grew from, but not something that continued to cause them the kind of pain they may have suffered while they were in the worst part of the process, whenever that might have been.
Over the years, I have peeked into a number of these women’s lives, and shared their joy/heartbreak/surprises/setbacks/perseverance/acceptance. I have not written any of the blogs down (of course) but recently I found a really cool site that collects blogs on a variety of topics, including infertility/IVF:
I have never really looked for blogs on other topics (do people get really excited about photography or irritable bowel syndrome?), but I think there is a special passion that drives many women to blog about infertility. It’s something that, on one hand, is all many of us want to talk/think about while we’re in the midst of it, and on the other hand is intensely personal and private. And that combination is a great fit for the internet. I’m not going to talk to my co-workers about ovulation predictor kits, stimulation protocols, or pregnancy symptoms, but I’ll anonymously dissect every little aspect of my chunky discharge (implantation bleeding or BFN?) with other like-minded women who might be doing the exact same thing. I guess it’s the combination of infertility being so isolating and, at the same time, something so many women experience and want to talk about.
I, like many of these blog-happy women, have found great comfort in detailing my own thoughts/feelings. So if you’re reading this because you’re a fellow I-want-to-be-a-mom-so-bad-er-but-it’s-just-not-working!—if you’re in the worst part of it—know that you’re not alone, there are others like you, and you will get through it. And maybe you should start a blog.
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